


Inhumane

by AnonEhouse



Series: Battling Coronavirus (varied fandoms) [3]
Category: X-Men (Movieverse)
Genre: COVID-19, Crack Treated Seriously, Gen, Happy Ending, coronavirus price gouging
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-25
Updated: 2020-03-25
Packaged: 2021-02-28 19:21:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 425
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23312275
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnonEhouse/pseuds/AnonEhouse
Summary: Against the corona virus, even villains hate price-gouging hoarders. Charles and Erik team up.
Relationships: Erik Lehnsherr & Charles Xavier
Series: Battling Coronavirus (varied fandoms) [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1676572
Comments: 28
Kudos: 130





	Inhumane

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"Price gouging during a time of declared state of emergency is illegal," a mild voice said.

The man loading pallets onto a forklift in front of a warehouse turned and scowled at the bald man sitting in a wheelchair. "Who says I'm price gouging? I just want an honest profit to support my family, since the government shut down my business."

"I do," the bald man said. He held his hand against his temple. "And you haven't given your family any support in years."

"Why you..." the man glared and stepped forward. "I oughta..."

"No, you really ought not," a voice came from above. 

"Oh, shit," the man said. "Magneto."

Magneto smiled as he descended lightly to the ground, asymmetrical cape flaring dramatically. It wasn't a reassuring expression. "You see, Charles? My product recognition is higher than yours."

"It's the cape," Xavier replied. "And the colors. Really, purple and red?"

Magneto's smile sharpened. "It's a mix of arterial red and venous blue."

Xavier's brow wrinkled. "Don't be ridiculous. The blue is merely an illusion when seen through translucent skin. Venous blood is dark red due to low oxygen content."

The man looked rapidly back and forth between them. "I don't want any trouble."

Xavier said, "I'm sure you don't. In fact, I am certain you purchased these N95 respirators in order to donate them to the nearest hospital."

"Yeah, yeah, that's right," the man said, glancing nervously at Magneto who was still smiling, and his cape was still fluttering despite there being no breeze at all. "I'll just load up my truck and drive it right there. You don't need to wait. I'm sure you have better things to do."

"Oh, it's no trouble at all." Charles put his hand to his temple again. Crates levitated out of the warehouse and neatly slotted into the waiting truck. The pallets on the forklift followed. Then the truck's rear door rolled down and sealed with a click.

"Thank you for your humanitarian efforts," Magneto said with a sneer. He waved his hands and the truck, Xavier in his wheelchair, and Magneto flew off.

"Well, at least I still have the hand sanitizers in the other warehouse," the man said philosophically.

Jean Grey walked around the corner and smiled at him. "You were saying?"


End file.
